Ode to the Nursery Bug

The school kids have been dropping,
1, 2 then 3,
And now it’s our turn,
How lucky are we!
I turned up at nursery,
only expecting a hug.
But instead we’re taking home,
the nursery bug!

How excited are we.
A brand new friend.
To come to our home,
and drive me round the bend.
At first you’ll be quiet,
We won’t even notice you’re there,
Until the toddler screams,
‘Ahh Mum there’s sick in my hair!’

All through the night,
The kids will hurl,
Until there is nothing left,
In my boy or my girl.
Puke in the bed.
Puke up the door.
With the only place left to sleep,
Being the bathroom floor.

After a few hours,
The wrenching will calm.
The fever will lower,
And their arses will need balm.
The back rubbing will cease,
As its needed no longer.
Thank fuck! my arms dead,
I really need to get stronger.

As sleep takes over,
I’ll get into my bed,
And bid you farewell,
Our fine buggy friend.
But just as I settle,
my stomach will flip.
I won’t be sure if I need to puke,
Or let one rip.
Oh no wait,
Yep I’m going to be sick.
Aw that’s it I’ve had enough,
You really truly are just a DICK!

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